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Old Skool World 10 mile champs race report

While the World's so called leading cycling stars preferred to spend time on the beach, in the courts or generally preferring the softer option of resting up in preparation for the upcoming Tour of Spain, World Road Race Championships, BTTC Championships and the last of the evening Cuckney '10's, the out and out psychopaths of our sport converged on the infamous F2A course in Cambridgeshire last weekend for the eagerly awaited premier edition of Planet X's World 10 miles Old Skool Championship.

The biggest field in the entire history of Planet X's Old Skool events took over the village of Cambourne for the weekend's events. Camp sites in the area had been fully booked for months in advance in anticipation of the entertainment that was rumoured to have been laid on by Stuart Tarry and his merry band from Team Whambam Design. Unconfirmed rumours that other leading bands including U2, Status Quo, Glenn Miller and that cute little quirky La Roux (with the aero hair-do) were also going to perform live still remain unconfirmed ... several days after the event (supposedly) took place.

Former leading lights of Planet X's Old Skool series have been ducking and diving all season trying to keep their form under wraps as far as the competition is concerned. The extent of ducking and diving however has led to most so-called 'big-hitters' either disappearing without trace or up their own posteriors (one of the penalties of international stardom I'm afraid). This has left the door open for a new generation of stars to emerge ... mostly in their 60s it must be said (but still many years younger than the likes of Cammish, "the Power" Parkinson et al).
And so the day dawned and the road network of Cambridgeshire was grid-locked with fans arriving from all four corners of the Universe to witness what was about to take place.
Years of dietary neglect and many months of physical torture in front of the TV with takeaways and the local off-licence's best deal of the week have found to be the order of the day for previous round winners ... but today's generation of stars appear to have turned over a new leaf in an effort to thrust themselves into the limelight and (virtually) guaranteed star status with all the 'trimmings' to boot ... such are the rewards of success in ANY of Planet X's events.

Although there was no clear cut favourite for the Championship, several 'has-beens' from previous series' events put in a show.  Gavin 'good man' Hinxman, now riding for the crack Kettering CC team, vowed to 'kick butt' in the Old Skool event after having competed in the earlier all aero event complete with his Gran's support stockings (as made famous by the Irish legends, Micky, Paddy, Hutchy and son), but his valient efforts got blown away in the strong winds that blew across the flat carriageways of Cambourne and he failed to live up to expectations to take the bronze medal with 24-03.

There were more old farts in evidence than you'd come across on a Saturday evening after a couple of vindaloos in the Bunda Khan . One prime example was Planet X's own Stuart Wright - putting in his first Old Skool appearance hoping to follow in the fine Old Skool record of the 'Silver Fox' himself Ian Cammish (last seen heading for passport control with lots of bags of duty free in his trolley being pursued by several men in white coats).  Wright upheld Team Planet X's excellent tradition of high placings by taking the Silver medal with 23-16.
Having already tasted a certain degree of success on the same roads last year, Horsham CCs Paul Mellen returned with only one thing on his mind "Can I get away with using my SRMs again in another Old Skool event?".  Anorak clad officials were far too busy 'coming in their cocoa' over all the all kit in evidence at the event than to be bothered with that. For goodness sake the man was using drop handlebars, no aero hat, deep rimmed wheels, discs or tri-bars wasn't he?  And he went faster than all the other old cronies ... so the top honours went his way with a fine 23-02.

For goodness sake the man was using drop handlebars, no aero hat, deep rimmed wheels, discs or tri-bars wasn't he?

Special mention must be made to Maldon CCs Ian McColl (pictured below) who recorded a superb 29-29 after 3 weeks of 24/7 shifts picking products to be packed in Planet X HQs super doper new(ish now) warehouse / showroom at Magna Way Rotherham. McColl was overheard to say to the paparazzi that he wouldn't have gone as fast if he hadn't been as keen to get it over with as quickly as possible so he could

get back to work. The men in their white coats will soon be tasked with dealing with McColl when their job with Cammish has been done! It seems  that Planet X has traditions in more ways than one.

Photos provided by that very nice Sarah Brooke (still so much better than that Kimroy-Silks don't you think?)

25 August 2010


  • Speedmeister

    Did they get lost then?

  • ianc

    The race HQ was at disputing that, but the Old Skool Toffysi took over Cambourne for the weekend. I was there along with thousands of others. The Council is till clearing up the aftermath. False teeth, flat caps and incontinence pads everywhere. We'll never be allowed back.

  • Simon B (Planet X Team)

    Cheers Speedmeister, well I'll take this factual error up with the Silver Fox direct. Thanks for your comment.

  • Speedmeister

    FYI: The HQ was at the rather lovely Comberton Village Hall and bypassed Cambourne completely, apart from that - a good report:-)

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