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Planet X

You’re only supposed to blow the doors off

During the planning for the great robbery in Italian job, the team of heisters attempted to remove the doors from an armoured van using explosives. Unfortunately, they over egged the mix and blew the van to smithereens – Charlie Crooker, the gangs ring leader famously exclaimed “you’re only supposed to blow the bloody doors off”.

Why are you telling me this? – I hear you ask!    

Well… during a recent sales meeting our illustrious founder Dave Loughran agreed to launch a new summer sale that would “blow the doors of the warehouse”. The sale was launched on Sunday and when we all arrived to work on Monday morning Dave was greeted with the very same exclamation from Kieran, our head of operations.

The doors, the walls, desks, tables chairs and roof were all blown to pieces as the sale pushed us to fulfil orders with unprecedented demand.

The now “famous Fibonacci sale” has been a huge success for us. It feels like all of our customers have been taking advantage of our great prices and because of this our warehouse and operations team are feeling the pressure.

The good news – Every man and his dog are manning the pumps, our marketing team, accountants and designers are all picking your orders in our busy warehouse!

We are throwing all of our available resources at the operation to meet your expectations and we are meeting our delivery promise.

We have upgraded everyone to next day delivery for free so once the item is dispatched you will get it the next day.

Don’t forget we will send you an update when we ship you order.

In the mean time, feel free to keep applying the pressure, Kieran is already bald.

25 August 2016

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